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Either way, the child is allowed to express their thoughts or concerns and feel validated without an argument. First, it creates anxiety and fear in the child, especially of the person who you are going to tell about whatever happened.

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Train yourself to explain the reason behind your statement.

“That is not safe” or “Your skin is not for coloring on” is specific and helps them learn why things are off limits, rather than just that they are.

Encouragement, and this phrase is arguably the most commonly spoken praise children hear. Instead of cutting off the conversation, you can say, “I know you want my answer to be different, but it will not change”.

You can also train yourself to make sure the child fully understands your response, with “I just told you my answer. ” This allows the child to present their opinion or get clarification.

We often try to teach lesson to kids about life at the most inappropriate times.

If a child gets hurt because they were doing something dangerous or inappropriate, they already learned their lesson.

You can always rephrase the sentence from a negative to a positive, which will correct the behavior without sounding critical.

Train yourself to say what you want them to do instead of what you don’t. Notice the common element is starting with the word “you” and then acknowledging what they worked at, rather than what you think about it.

It is wasted words to try to express a rule when a child is upset, as they focus on one thing at a time.


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